today i decided i was going to have a good day. after a good talk with one of my amazing friends last night and a good night of sleep, i figured, "hey, i deserve a good day and today is that day!"
Well, that just didnt happen. no matter how hard i tried. today sucks. I just want to be at work now. I dont want to be here.
I get into my philosophy class this morning and my Professor tells me that today might be hard for me with everything thats happened...well he wasnt kidding. We were discussing death and yeah...so so hard to fight back the tears...then got into my economics class and asked about the grade I got on the test that i had to make up due to the fact that i was not in class because Sam died. well, i studied my butt of for that test. did all the extra credit i could. re-read all the chapters, Brandon even helped me study late into the night and after all that, still got a freaking 58%. awesome. now i have a D in the class because we never do homework its just all test grades. How am i supposed to get my grade up with the next test and then pass the final and get at least a low C in the class? If i dont get a C, i can lose my scholarship and will have to pay it back...lovely. just what i need.
It feels like bad things just keep happening. will this ever stop? I just want to have one good day. Is that so hard to ask for? I know im just whining and complaining but this is getting a lil ridiculous. Just makes me wanna scream.
I feel so stupid for getting upset over this, i mean this is nothing compared to what other people have to go through. but, it just sucks. Wish i could just rewind a few months, go back to when things were good, when Sam was still here and i could spend time with her. sadly i cant.
peaces!
-em
Hey girl. I'm so sorry that today was so hard. While it's good to have some perspective on the "bigger things in life," don't belittle your troubles. Getting a bad grade on a test, being sad, and missing a friend are all very valid things to be frustrated about. In regards to your test grade, go and sit down with your professor. Explain what has been going on and ask if there is anything you can do to improve and/or replace that test grade. Suggest a paper or some type of research that could be added to your current grade. When you take the initiative, professors will usually help you out.
ReplyDeleteLet me know if there anything I can do to help, with anything. I love you Em and I'm praying for you and your sweet heart.